Your Job Is To Live

When the final countdown begins and the end is in sight, change is a hard thing to grasp. I'm nervous, you guys. I'm a little bit scared and probably could use all the hugs. My world is completely changing, and I'm the one who's changed it. Again. It's not something that I find helpful to complain about, mind you. Rather, it's just...surreal. Am I ready? Am I really doing this? Now what do I do?  I have unlimited options. I have a blank canvas. I have zero attachments. So now what? My heart is a little heavy, if I'm being honest. There are things I will say "goodbye" to that I love--like the people whom I work with, for example. Like people in my life who, while I may not see them every day, I take comfort in knowing they're out there, somewhere, close enough to see in a moment's notice. There are parts about my identity that I will have to let go of as well. There are things I like about myself that are exercised or put to use thro...

Since I've been back, I've been surprised by how open I've been about talking about my experiences with ayahuasca. It's hard, I think, to integrate the lessons you learn from such a profoundly spiritual adventure into your daily life. You begin to question the importance of trivial things in your life, how you don't need to stress about each and every "little thing," and consider this an opportunity to freshly liberate yourself from your past. Yet, at the same time, it's been important for me to be easy on myself and take each moment, each day, as they come; transitioning into a vegetarian lifestyle or being mindful of your ability to facilitate inner peace are not the simplest of tasks. Last night, I was thinking about what I would say about the rest of my ayahuasca journey, as it is quite personal and self-revealing. Indeed, I don't have to say anything about it if I do not wish to do so, but what service to others would I be neglecting if I ke...

I'm going to make this post a little more light-hearted, but I will definitely get back to the aya journey in a future blog writing. For now, let's go over some of the main take-aways from jungle living. You ready? You better be. 1) My hair doesn't dry in the jungle. Nope. My fine ass hair doesn't really dry at all, and so I kind of had semi-greasy hair all week long. Oh well! No one cares about what your hair looks like in the jungle. 2) Cold showers aren't so bad. We did have hot water--which I was incredibly grateful for the first, full day there when all you want is a hot shower to relax after such a long journey to get there. However, after a few days, it wasn't such a big deal to refrain from using hot water. I learned how to be thankful for the "little things" like hot showers, and I also felt as though I was more mindful of not over-using too much water as well. I don't think I'll be trading my life in for a pioneer lifestyle a...